quote

"What is to give light must endure burning." Viktor Frankl

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Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail beta.

15 November 2006
"And we are put on earth a little space that we may learn to bear the beams of Love." -- Blake

Casa guatemala - Río Dulce wrote:
Hola Lora, My name is Patricia,Im a volunteer at Casa Guatemala and helping out coordinating the new volunteers thanks for comming to help us.
The things that we need are: scissors, red, black, blue pen, liquid glue, pencil sharpener, rubber.
we need shorts for kids from 10 to 16, and t-shirts.
toothpaste.....

Thanks alot. We looking for to having you in Casa Guatemala. If you have any more questions just send us and e-mail. Patricia

Casa Guatemala ONG wrote:
Thanks Lora.
We will be starting our school year in February, so, please, any school supplies you can think of it will be very welcome.
You also may like to bring some cartrache fro the printers Canon 40, Canon 41, Canon 24 black and color, as many as you can get.
See you then and thanks again
Angie

14 November 2006, Wednesday
Found a great website for pictures of Antigua Guatemala: www.antiguadailyphoto.com. Things are moving forward, I hope. Life does sometimes happen while we're busy making plans so we'll see what comes.

Nevertheless, this morning I move forward as if I will be leaving for Guatemala in early January. I just made a contact through the Casa Guatemala board with a woman who is just now heading out to spend 2 months at Casa. She speaks no Spanish and is 70 years old! Hip-hip-hooray! I'm not the only wild one out and about. She is taking 140 lbs of everything she can find - clothes, money. . . as she said, "They need so much." I will take school supplies and books with me. (www.casa-guatemala.org).

I housesitting until Dec 15. Then I'll return to Nancy's in Hotchkiss as my homebase and spend some time in Denver with Michelle and Sarina, and perhaps some time in Leadville with Catherine and David. Oh, how I hope things have semi-stabilized by then. Life's roads are rocky sometimes.

Tomorrow is Catherine's concert, her first solo. I'm like way nervous for her. Huge butterflies in my stomach when I think of it. Silly me.

I must email Volunteer Peten (www.volunteerpeten.com) and let him know I'm coming, with books, but cannot say when.

So many little details to take care of . . . . .

13 October, 2006
Friday Morning
I awoke early this morning, as is my wont, and rather than risk setting off a land mine in 14-year-old Mel's room - which I must pass through to get to the bathroom - I decided to drive down to the local quick store for coffee. No wireless available there, so I decide to go for an early morning drive. It's nostalgic. I drive toward Crawford, then turn and head up the backroad to Paonia. All looks different, unearthly and unfamiliar, in the dark. Small hillocks, trees, fences, houses, all loom out at me as I pass. My headlights shine off into nothingness when passing through the adobes. It's a good drive: quiet, dark, no one else on the road. A time to reflect and even take the morning drive as a metaphor for my life right now. For it does seem that, even though the terrain is well known, I feel as if I am heading through a strange and unfamiliar land. My usual doors are closing to me, either by external circumstance or internal resistance. I don't know what draws me to head toward southeast Arizona. I suspect it's the monastery at St David's, but I don't know.So, in my state of openness to the prospect of travel, I ran across an acquaintance who practically spoke my mind. She also wants to head to se Arizona, doesn't know why, finds other paths blocked. And I of course have really been asking for a traveling companion of some sort. Meeting her and learning about a group known as Loners on Wheels have been a great impetus for me to go ahead and follow my passion, or my gut or my heart. I needed that kind of support.I'm also investigating the possibility of a trip to Central America this winter. I'd rather do it sooner than later, and the two spans of time that are available to me are Feb-May and Sep-Dec. I'd just as soon go in Feb/Mar.Nevertheless, in this moment. . . . I'm sitting in the Coal Train Coffeehouse. Sweet little place in Hotchkiss. My internet connection is not free. Each time I come in here I spend $3-$5 on coffee and pastries. I try to hold off on the pastries. Generally I like to use the libraries around here. They truly are free.My RV is finally out of the mud and at the mechanic's. I must go to Grand Junction one of these days soon, perhaps today, to get the parts for the door window and find out about tow bars. Nancy is so sweet to make space for me but she does have a crowded situation and a full plate with a teenager and an injured friend staying in her cottage. Jan and Rich have offered their place to me for a week while they are on vacation. That would be great, just perfect. I'd have space to spread out, repack, use the phone, all those things that are so difficult to do when there are people around.

12 October 2006
Heading in a New Direction
It seems a blog is the way to go for just keeping up with my whereabouts and plans. I can journal when off-line then just transfer my journal to the blog. I must learn to transfer my thinking so that I know I'm actually writing for others to read, not just for myself as I do in my journal. Which means I suppose that it should be more interesting.All paths are being blocked to me except, it appears, the one that leads to southeast Arizona. Yesterday I ran across an acquaintance and she and I shared notes about heading in that direction. Interesting. One of my deepest fears is going along. At least if I have a rider and I know someone there when I get there, I'll feel lots better.I do have as my ultimate destination the monastery at St. David's. I'd like to stay there for the month of December then return to Colorado before Christmas. What if one of these volunteer opportunities was available in January or February? That would be wonderful. I'll be doing lots of reading and research about the various opportunities. The most interesting one so far is one recommended by Reda, Volunteer Peten. My Spanish is non-existent and I doubt that I can learn much, though I'd certainly do what I could between now and then to learn a few words, and I'd take the Spanish class there too.Keeping up with communications is a huge challenge. Knowing that I can journal then blog it when I get to internet access feels like a great relief to me.My Challenges:1) Loneliness2) Communications3) Money (Work)4) Meaningful Work

11 August 2006, Saturday

"Kilgore Trout once wrote a short story which was a dialogue between two pieces of yeast. They were discussing the possible purposes of life as they ate sugar and suffocated in their own excrement. Because of their limited intelligence, they never came close to guessing that they were making champagne." Kurt Vonnegut

I am at this moment sitting quietly in my little ‘cabin in the woods’. Sarina and Michelle left early this morning. I was in a tizzy, as usual. It is always, always so difficult for me to face being alone. Even though I know by heart - having experienced it so many times - exactly how the whole experience will go, I still feel this tremendous angst as I face aloneness. When I’ve had a loved one around a lot, daily, I begin to look forward to the opportunity to have some time to myself. I get a bit grouchy, feel a bit interfered with. As the moment of parting gets closer and closer, the desire to be alone is replaced by a strong fear of being alone. I don’t want everyone to leave; I don’t want to be alone. So I create some tizzy. Ack. Being human.

It is a delightful afternoon. I wish I could sit outside to write on the computer but I can’t see the screen in the outside light. It is a delight to write on this little laptop. The keys feel like a smooth flowing pen; the editor capitalizes and corrects spelling as I go along. Additionally, it is now ripping music files from my CD ‘Tibet Impressions’ so that I might listen as I write. I cannot help but be totally impressed with this fine technology. This is the first opportunity I’ve had to actually sit down and use this little laptop, other that emails. The grandkids have been watching movies on it and playing games - quite helpful on this long nights in the woods!

So, enough about this fine computer! I must begin now to think about what my future year will look like. I’m still reluctant to travel too far away, not yet knowing what Catherine’s needs will be this year. Yet, there is nothing to say that I can’t head down to New Mexico and Arizona sometime in early October, stay at the Trinity Monastery in St. David’s for a period of time, then return to Colorado in November. If Catherine needs support I could move up there in January. I know I could find a place to stay and work to do. Even if not the most profitable I could make it work. I will also hold open the option to go back to Delta H&R to work. And I may find options available to me in Arizona or New Mexico while there. Hilde and I talked about meeting up in Arizona in early November. Michelle and I talked about taking a trip together with Sarina in December. All of these ideas seem to flow together quite well.

I must work. I must generate an income along the way. I wish I knew how long I will want to stay in Arizona and how long my money will hold out. I will get on-line one of these days and look up some possibilities for work this winter. Workamper has been sending me emails by the scads so I assume there’s plenty of work to be had. I’m not sure how long I can tolerate tent camping. I wish I had a compatible traveling companion.

Okay, okay. But I have to find a purpose in life. Michelle is offering that with her writing and publishing possibilities but I can’t yet see how that will work for me. It is so difficult for me to live in Denver, though I might give it a try. However, I don’t want to have to lease an apartment for 6 or more months and I can’t see staying with Michelle for more than just a few days.

It’s such fun to watch campers come and go here. They arrive, check out a campsite as if they are the first to discover it, then settle in with all their gear. I think of my own past experiences of camping. Yet now as a camp host I see so many people come and go. I know that the site that someone is just newly discovering was just vacated an hour before. We always feel as if we’re the first ones there, but this little plot of land has a whole history of people coming and going.
A young couple from San Francisco just settled into campsite 8. Methinks they read about this campground in Backpacker magazine. Grrrr......

I swear, Jupiter seems to be as lonely and at loose ends as I am. He sits by the door today, all day, watching, watching.

Sometimes I think I do have this deep, deep fear of being alone and that’s really what all that angst is about. Yet, when I am alone - after a day or so - I sink into it just fine. I don’t need to ask why or what or anything. I actually enjoy going for a day or more without speaking to anyone. I look forward to spending an extended period of time in a monastery, living a monastic lifestyle for awhile, which will mean...... what? Long periods of silence and meditation; attending Mass daily; service.

I’m wanting some of my stuff from my storage unit: Autobiography of a Yogi, the Roof Bag.
I’ve just finished a dinner of ramen noodles. The refrigerator is on the blink. I must learn how to make tortillas.

It’s 8pm. I will take a walk along the creek then come in and meditate for 15 minutes tonight. I will now begin to set up a routine of meditation morning and night.

12 August 2006, Sunday
Rained hard last night. Stepped out the door this morning into that rich aroma that I will forever associate with this place. I had an anxious spell in the middle of the night, that ucky feeling like my breathing will stop if I don’t focus on it and consciously breathe. I do think I suffer from sleep apnea. The grandkids often comment on my snoring. Their descriptions indicate to me that I’m actually choking and gasping for air. Sarina nudged me awake the other night and said, ‘You sound like you’re drowning.’ Last night it felt like extremely low blood pressure. When one is not breathing deeply or well, I know it creates that sensation of anxiety.

I did meditate last night and this morning. I will continue to keep that discipline. I need it so much.

I went for a walk up the trail this morning. All is wet and shining and sweet. However, I was wearing jeans and it was apparent that I would not be able to walk far before my jeans would be soaked. So, I turned around and returned to the place where some logs have collected along the stream bank. There I sat and enjoyed my morning coffee and the beauty of early morning sun on a mountain stream. Looking downstream it was all white and sparkling, almost blinding.

I think that tomorrow I will take off in the afternoon and head in the direction of Paonia, with a stop somewhere along the way for a good hike. Then perhaps I’ll camp out over at Valerie’s farm and work on the farm in the morning. Ack, I must dig out my camping gear from where ever it is. I’m starting to need different things from my storage unit and dread going in there and moving things around. I wonder if there’s anyone available who could help me with that. Perhaps Nancy?

20 August 2006, Sunday
Re-evaluating solar. Whew. What is it that I want? I want to be able to live in this RV for up to 6 months of the year. That means I need: lights, heat (fan), water pump. How much energy does it take to supply that? According to Backwoods, at least 250 watts, which brings the cost to some where in the neighborhood of $3,000. That does not include an external gas generator, such as a Honda 2000, another $1,000. And then I have......?

Okay, let’s start over. I have some components installed already. Perhaps my battery is okay. I have a gas generator built-in. Most likely I have a DC breaker box someplace. I have a power convertor someplace. So at minimum I may only need a meter: $200, one solar panel: $500, a charge controller: $150. Misc connectors, mounts, etc: $150. Labor: $200. If I need a battery: $200. Total to set up solar: $1,200-$1,400

I hate lead acid batteries, I really do. I must read up on the process of creating solar panels.
Yesterday Ryan and I went for a walk up on Independence Pass. I think it was Lost Man Trail and we hiked past and up above Independence Lake to Midway Pass. There we could look down on Lost Man Lake and the continuation of the trail far off into a wooded canyon. No, we will not follow it today. Getting to the pass took at least a couple of hours, perhaps 2 ½ miles or so. Not too far; just a very nice day’s hike. I hunger for that altitude, that sweet alpine air, the vegetation native to that environ, the water, clear streams, craggy rocks, clusters of healthy looking evergreens, wide-open basin covered in sky. It was wonderful to get up above tree-line.
Today will be a day at the campground. It’s cold. The sky is patchy with clouds. Everything is wet. I shall write and meditate. Perhaps I’ll make a fire today. Perhaps I’ll visit with the campers.

Later: It’s warming up nicely outside. Lots of people have packed up and gone - heading to town for a big breakfast, perhaps a soak in the hot springs, then the drive home. Some have stayed. My Heavens, may as well, after having put up with all the rain we’ve had the past few days.

22 August 2006, Tuesday
I am just back to the campground after spending a couple of days and a night in Leadville with David. We both agreed that it was wonderful to get there but, like Prospect Mtn Ranch, one night is just not enough to satisfy. So I begin making plans to get there over the Thanksgiving Holiday. It’s a given we’ll go there, but just need to decide if it will be Thursday-Friday or Friday-Saturday.

Ah, that loneliness. How awful it is each time I am alone again. It just settles into my belly, pressing down, making me nauseous. I must stay busy to avoid being with it. I love the quiet and alone time here - once I get into it. But it’s always the same at first: I can hardly face a stretch of a day or two alone. It’s so nice to come home to Jupiter. He’s less happy to see me than he is to be fed canned food and always ready to step outside for awhile. Now he’s here at my lap - now he’s gone! Back to the door, he sits and stares at the world. He doesn’t appear to be hunting; just sitting and watching.

So after all the figuring and this and that, I’ve finally decided that all this solar panels and battery stuff for household energy is highly over-rated. Unless one just cannot get energy any other way, active solar is just yuppy stuff. One must always have gas generator backup. And the cost, for my application, really is prohibitive. For $1,500 maybe I get 5 years of solar for the RV, 4-5 months use per year. $300/year for 5 months use is $60/month for lights, water pump and furnace fan. I think I’d rather plug into electric whenever possible, skip the solar and just get a good gas generator and a battery meter. I think I also need an engine battery and a deep cell battery. See, there I am again. I’m back at $1,500 without batting an eye.

I’m not able to spend time at Trinity Monastery in a tent. I must either travel catless and stay in the cottages or go in the RV to New Mexico and Arizona. Dang, though. Am I going to tow my car? I don’t want to. What is the purpose of my trip? 1) Just travel, move about, watch sunsets, hike trails, meditate, journal. Whew! That’s a lot already! 2) Look for a place to own/rent - a seasonal home or piece of land. Some place I can live when I’m not traveling about. In Colorado it might be a summer accessible cabin/piece of land. In Arizona it might be only usable in the winter. And what about exploring further north, as in Montana? Probably not. When it comes to mountains I love Colorado and already have my network of friends, family and connections here. I see no reason to change all that at this point in my life.

We drove through Minturn to Leadville today. Oh, my, the forests south of Minturn are devastated by bark beetle. It looks nice and healthy as one heads further south, towards Leadville, but still a walk in the forests near town reveals a lot of dead pine needles on the young pine trees. We stopped at Hornsilver Campground. Devastated. There’s not a tree left standing in the campground. There are trees on the surrounding slopes but they too are infested and the infestation is spreading. So, where will it all end? What about all the life that’s dependent on those particular trees? The insects, birds, small ground and tree animals, the deer and elk, beer and mountain lion? Of course I’ve been stunned at the lack of wildlife around the campground here. I’ve seen a total of 3 elk. That’s it. No other animal sign. Trash bags can be left outside and will not be disturbed. What does this mean?

23 August 2006, Wednesday
I continue to try to figure out how my near future will be organized. Do I want to keep this RV? Does it make sense? Or should I try to sell it this coming January in Quartzite? Now that was a new thought!

It seems the first thing I must do is get a good tutorial on the electrical system here. What is it capable of? How can I meter it? Where is the breaker box? Why is the engine battery drawn so low? I have lots of questions. I will call Christopher when I am in Paonia and see if I can go up to their place when I leave here. Maybe spend a day or two just going through what I want, what it does, what I want it to do.

It is sooooo peaceful here. I woke up at 4am and was suddenly, overwhelmingly bored! I thought, ‘That’s my problem. I’m just bored.’ It is difficult to go to be at 8pm and sleep through the night. But once the sun is down there’s really not a whole lot left to do. I think I’m going to try to download some websites when I’m in town today so that I can read them when I get home. Websites about New Mexico and Arizona mostly. I need a goal, a purpose, an intent for this trip. Aimless wandering just won’t cut it for me. Shall I be visiting all the monasteries in the southwest? Shall I be practicing survival techniques? Shall I be looking for a place to live? Shall I be just shaking some dust off my boots? Shall I be writing, meditating, journaling, photographing? Shall I be visiting intentional communities? No, I’m not interested in intentional communities really, only in some idealistic sense. What about world travel? I won’t get on an airplane again.

If I take the RV without the car to Arizona, my mobility is limited. It will cost $600 for gas. A savings of $420 - maybe - over driving the car. I say maybe because I’d probably tend to drive around more in the car. The $420 I’d save would be spent on a new tent and a cover for the RV - together around $800. Not to mention that I’m going to have to pay for storage for this beast if I’m not living in it. So the question is not one of finances. It’s a bit complicated but it looks as if it’s more expensive not to take it then to take it. The thing is, I like my mobility and I don’t really want to drag my car along behind - at least not right now. I really would prefer a trip by car. How long can I live on what I have left allotted to myself for living? Maybe 4 months. Then I must begin to dip into the $10,000. Well, I don’t quite understand why but I really cannot say no to this trip this winter, frivolous and costly as it might be.

The big challenge always is finding meaning in the journey. I have often told Michelle, ‘We are the ones who bring meaning to anything. Nothing in and of itself has meaning.’ What I mean to say is that I wish to bless my travels and tell myself that it’s okay to just go and do, without worry. I guess I’m back now in this moment once again thinking that my favorite plan is to travel in car with cat into New Mexico and Arizona, returning by way of the Grand Canyon and Southern Utah in early November. Perhaps Michelle will want me to visit some intentional communities along the way. Will I find enough trails to keep me happy? I have visions of the glowing, rolling mountains of New Mexico, of hiking up mountainsides lit by the yellow September sun.

26 August 2006, Saturday
A Day in the Life. . . .
Surf’s up. Upon returning from my morning sunrise walk I went down to the stream to retrieve the cooler, whereupon I discovered it out in the middle of the stream! Most disconcerting. Back to the cabin to put on sandals and roll up my pants for the walk out into the icy water. My feet are wrapped in wool socks now but still burn at the toes.

What a wonderful sunrise this morning; the light seemed to push a bank of clouds over the craggy ridge. The cloud flowed down into a steep v-shaped valley and puffed up high above the ridge, the center dark but the fringes brilliantly backlit by the sun. Ah. I’m in charge of celebrations today it seems; no one else was there.

I think I shall light myself a fire this morning. Why not? It’s not yet 9am and promising to be a beautiful day but one never knows what the morning will bring. I could certainly enjoy sitting by a fire, warming my toes and drying off.

Wonderful Quotes
"i thank You God for most this amazing
day: for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky; and for everything
which is natural which is infinite which is yes."
E.E. Cummings

"I don’t think I can learn from a wild animal how to live in particular. . . But I might learn something of mindlessness, something of the purity of living in the physical senses and the dignity of living without bias or motive."
Annie Dillard

"It’s a popular fact that 90 percent of the brain is not used and, like most popular facts, it is wrong . . . . It is used. One of its functions is to make the miraculous seem ordinary, to turn the unusual into the usual. Otherwise, human beings, faced with the daily wondrousness of everything, would go around wearing a stupid grin, saying, "Wow," a lot. Part of the brain exists to stop this from happening. It is very efficient, and can make people experience boredom in the middle of marvels."
Terry Pratchett

"I had assumed that the earth, the spirit of the earth, noticed exceptions - those who wantonly damage it and those who do not. But the earth is wise. It has given itself into the keeping of all, and all are therefore accountable." Alice Walker

"Perhaps the most radical thing we can do is to stay home, so we can learn the names of the plants and animals around us; so that we can begin to know what tradition we’re of."
Terry Tempest Williams

"Now we will count to twelve and we will all keep still for once on the face of the earth, let’s not speak in any language; let’s stop for a second, and not move our arms so much."
Pablo Neruda

Raining. Raining, raining, raining. Hailing too, last evening. It’s cool. There was a break in the rain this morning around 7am so I went out for a walk along the road. It’s a lovely walk in the morning when it’s wet; the clouds float between ridges often not visible, wrap themselves around craggy rock faces and soften them, brighten and darken like children’s faces. These soft light clouds can quickly move together to form a grey, impenetrable wall and soon the air is mist, then rain. Monsoonal. I have no yardstick to compare the current summer to as I have lived in such an arid climate. It is hard to believe that a mere 50 miles down the road I’m now in some sort of normal monsoon zone. But I hear that it’s raining a lot more than usual throughout the region. So I heard about Paonia the last time I was there, yet to me it seemed hot and dry, the dryness only temporarily relieved by the rain. Not wet, not really wet, like it is here.

I’ve been reading about global climate change, end of oil, weather, alternative sources of energy (to fossil fuels). It’s all quite confusing but basically it seems to be saying that we need to be aggressively preparing for peak oil - which of course we’re not - in order to stave off a catastrophic shift. We humans truly don’t know what to do. Well, we do, but we don’t know how to do it. And we are so busy destroying, so busy destroying. The resources that the US is currently using to destroy Iraq and Afghanistan is unbelievable. Meanwhile, our infrastructure is crumbling. Our public roads are being sold to foreign investors, for God’s sake! The real estate market in Aspen (and similar places, one assumes) is booming - up 17% over last year - while moderate income earners begin to feel the real estate crunch. It’s a game I’m glad I’m out of for the time being. If I had tons of money, that would be one thing. But that’s not even the whole story. I lived with a roommate and used enough energy to warm a family of 8. The cost of gas and wood had risen so much last year that I spent between $250-$300/month for heat. I’m so glad to be out of there. Then there’s the decision: what to do next? So, I’m situated until the end of November. If not in one of these campgrounds then I’ll park my little Cabin in the Woods somewhere and go on the road with my cat. Me and my cat and a Hobitat 4. (I’ve just got to buy one of those!) See? There I go. I love driving around in a car looking at the countryside and buying the latest and best.

01 September 2006, Friday
7am. Cool again this morning but definitely warmed up over the 38 degrees of a few days ago. Yesterday was a balmy 43 when I awoke. Kyle has a thermometer. I want one. :o) My old avaricious self rears it’s head again.

It’s been wonderful having Kyle around the past few days. We’ve spent the days reading, meditating, contemplating, discussing. We’ve been reading from The Second Coming of Christ by Paramahansa Yogananda. It’s an interesting process in my head. I take issue with this or that. I defend my beliefs (in my head) if they do not correspond with what Rudolf Steiner said. As if I was worthy of tying the shoelaces of either of these men, much less interpreting and analyzing. I suffer from much hubris. It is good. I needed humbling. Kyle and I got into a discussion at the end of the reading last night about the nature of the Christ. Ha on that too. It is so silly to argue with another about the nature of Christ. That has caused wars. It is not the Christ who creates wars but the false beliefs that we individually hold. For, truth is, I am so far from where I seek to go that I can barely begin the journey. I feel like after 60 years of unconscious living I’m only just beginning to learn how to be conscious. Now that‘s not a true thought! My path, like Siddhartha’s, has been checkered. There have been times when I have been deeply immersed in Maya, or materialism. There have been times when I have been deeply immersed in just living every day. Working, raising my daughters, sorting through my own dysfunctions, doing the best I knew how to do at the time.

I’ve begun writing my autobiography today. That will be a spotty adventure, though I imagine once I get going a floodgate will open.

Today: Today I shall go to town. Kyle is leaving sometime today and I will head toward Carbondale at the same time. I have much business to take care of today - post office, library, groceries, tires, phone calls, emails. The list is endless it seems and all the chores will not be finished today.

A glorious sky last night. It was black to the south when I went to sleep but by middle of the night the clouds had disappeared, as had the waxing moon, leaving a black, black sky filled with myriad tiny lights. How wonderful to awaken in the middle of the night and look up at that. One of the joys of not having indoor plumbing. :o)

08 September 2006, Friday
Well, this is fun. I’m on my way to the Front Range - Denver and Colorado Springs. I packed up the RV and moved it over to the Redstone campground. Leaving from there noonish, I passed through P'Ville to take care of a few things then headed out. I spent Wednesday night in Collegiate Campground. The forest there looks wonderfully healthy. I didn’t do any hiking though as I froze my buns off all night in my new sleeping bag. I went to the 2nd hand store in Buena Vista and bought a couple of extra blankets so last night was better. It was also warmer outside last night.

Life is swell. Jupiter is perched on his pillow on top of his carrier, looking out at the world. It’s raining right now - just lightly, misting. I love this tent! I must write REI and tell them how much I like it. When I unzip the door and window and the two little windows on the side and the rainfly, it feels like a gazebo. I really wanted a gazebo type structure as well as a tent large enough to walk around it. This one is just perfect and meets both my needs. Most of the larger tents I considered were either too expensive and/or to large and heavy for me to handle by myself. This one cost $278 and weighs 18 lbs. Besides, I like the name: Hobitat. It seems like a bunch of these would be wonderful in a disaster for people to use.

Speaking of disasters...... the world could be ending right now and I wouldn’t know it. It seems rather rickety at the moment. The continual power struggles that go on. And rats. They just discovered a bunch of oil in the Texas bay. It is said to increase our stock by 50%. I don’t know. I wonder. It seems such an opportune time to announce something like this. I’ve gotten to the point that I don’t trust anything that I hear from the mainstream media. But I don’t want to go down that alley.

One problem I’ve discovered in this tent living with a cat is that kitty litter gets everywhere. We don’t normally see it in the house with all its carpets and rugs but here on this black plastic floor it stands out like crazy. Other than that everything’s wonderful. I rigged up a private bath for him in one corner: a towel on the floor, a sheet hanging from the ceiling, then off to the side on a corner of the towel I put his food and water. The one thing I really need is a little folding chair to support my back while sitting on the ground. I have a folding chair but actually I’d prefer to just stay on the ground.

Sound of rain falling lightly on the tent. The stream is burbling - big bubbles - sounds very different from Avalanche Creek. Here there are big, rounded boulders in the stream, nothing that really makes any white water. But the rocks do slow and build up the water’s movement, dropping it over rounded waterfalls and wrapping up in the slight curves then dropping it in plops to the pools below. Willows surround the stream though there are obvious openings in them where fishermen come and go. Then, directly across from this campsite a healthy forest climbs up a rocky steep hillside.

I must seem so odd to some people. Here I am, going camping, after having lived as a campground host all summer. But this is different, so different. And ya, here I am with my cat and my bowl and my laptop, sitting in my little nylon hacienda, just enjoying the heck out of life.

Seek God first; all else will be given.